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Friday, March 8, 2013

Sibling Rivalry or Sibling Love

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Random conversation with my 8-year-old son Russell...

Russell: Mom I think Raeka is lucky, more lucky than me.

Scared that my answer will start sibling rivalry..

Me: What made you think that?

Russell: You're already great at taking care of babies because you had lots of practice with me. Her baby bottles are expensive, mine are the cheap bottles. You bought her bumbo seat, I didn't have that. You bought her the cute diapers in different colors (cloth diapers). She have more toys because all old my toys will be hers if she wants them. You bought the car seat and you can take her to the mall in the car but with me we just took a taxi or jeep. We have more money now  so you can buy her more things than me.

He looked really sad and jealous of her sister which got me more worried.

Me: Who asked me if we can have another baby?

Russell: I did.

Me: What did you say when mom and dad told you that I'm pregnant?

Russell: Yehey! We're gonna have a baby!

Me: Yes, baby Raeka is really lucky.

interrupting me...

Russell: See I told you so... (sad face)

Me: Yeah she's lucky. Mom and dad are not planning to have another baby, because we are so happy with you. But when you asked us if we can have a baby and you'll be happier when you have a baby brother or sister, we changed our mind. See, baby is here because of you, because you asked for her, you prayed for her, you wished for her. She won't be here if not for you. She's really lucky because she has a big brother that loves her so much. Do you love baby?

Russell: I love her mom, she's my sister. You must love me too because you listened to me and still listen to me now.

Me: You know I love you, you're my prince Russell remember?

Russell: Yeah.... I love you mom and dad too. Oh and baby also! (kiss)


It was easier to shut him up and tell him that he's wrong but what good will that do? He might resent having a sister and might hate us too. Instead, I acknowledged his feelings and helped him look at the brighter side of the situation.

How do you handle converstations like this with your older child? I would love to hear about it. Please post your comment and I'll get back to you as soon as I'm online.

Blessed be.


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